I have a cold. Not just any cold. I have the worst cold to ever infect a person in the history of the universe. This is what I look like today:
This is what I normally look like:
Do you see the horrid transformation cough due to cold and or minor bronchial irritation has done to me? Here is how I have tried to treat this monstrous invasion thus far:
(Saturday) 2 shots of underground herbal liquor, 4 rum and cokes, a cheeseburger, 2 Coors lights, football game, spicy cowboy corn dog with so much mustard, more rum and coke, 3 Coors lights. (little bit o romance) 4 hours sleep, (Sunday) coffee, nap, cheeseburger, Gatorade, 7 Reese's peanut butter cups, 4 chicken nuggets, Dexter, sleep, (Monday) coffee.
CRITICAL NOTE: I've peppered in almost non stop complaining.
None of the above has worked and I am starting to fear that this retched cold is incurable. I am going to go eat a Philly steak sandwich. I feel like it's my last resort. Hannah says there is something called Triaminic but it sounds to new age for me. All I can really do is pray that with more greasy food, chocolate and time I can recover. If that doesn't pan out and the worst is realized. I have a message for everyone who reads this blog. All four of you. But I forget what it is. That's too bad I'm pretty sure it was life changing.
Do you see the horrid transformation cough due to cold and or minor bronchial irritation has done to me? Here is how I have tried to treat this monstrous invasion thus far:
(Saturday) 2 shots of underground herbal liquor, 4 rum and cokes, a cheeseburger, 2 Coors lights, football game, spicy cowboy corn dog with so much mustard, more rum and coke, 3 Coors lights. (little bit o romance) 4 hours sleep, (Sunday) coffee, nap, cheeseburger, Gatorade, 7 Reese's peanut butter cups, 4 chicken nuggets, Dexter, sleep, (Monday) coffee.
CRITICAL NOTE: I've peppered in almost non stop complaining.
None of the above has worked and I am starting to fear that this retched cold is incurable. I am going to go eat a Philly steak sandwich. I feel like it's my last resort. Hannah says there is something called Triaminic but it sounds to new age for me. All I can really do is pray that with more greasy food, chocolate and time I can recover. If that doesn't pan out and the worst is realized. I have a message for everyone who reads this blog. All four of you. But I forget what it is. That's too bad I'm pretty sure it was life changing.